A helmet in time...

Sunday, July 6, 2008

I’ve had many bad days. And this one ranks as one of those. My train to Asansol was cancelled. So this post too is from Bhubaneswar.

You are sniggering at my opening lines. You’re thinking I haven’t got anything to write today, eh? I do. Sort of.

It was the trip to the railway station that brought up the issue. The issue of rider safety on Indian roads. To be more precise, it’s the issue of wearing an adequate cranium-protecting-cum-face-shielding device while riding a motorized two-wheeler. To be even more precise, I’m talking about wearing a helmet while riding a bike.

OK, let’s get this straight. An ISI approved helmet costs some extra bucks when compared to one that has probably been put together by a bunch of 8-year old kids in sub-human conditions. I agree. And you buy those helmets to indirectly give the families of those poor kids a meal to live on for one more day. I agree. You’ve thus done some social service which you can be really proud of. It’s all good up to this point.

You wear that helmet when you ride your bike the next day. I SHALL DESPISE YOU FOR THAT!!! And I shall also take the liberty of calling you a brainless twat who can’t find his own buttocks with his two hands. You, by wearing that helmet and believing that it is going to save your skull and face in the event of a 100 mph crash, will have obtained the exclusive distinction of crossing the Rubicon of lunacy. You would be much better off wearing a Gandhi cap! You should be bright enough to understand that cheap helmets are neither ergonomically designed, nor are they made of materials that are sufficiently rigid to protect the head in case of high-speed crashes. What’s more, they splinter in the event of an impact, and are responsible for more fatalities than the accidents themselves. In short, you deserve to be dead if you put such an abysmal price on your life.

In recent times, the honourable state government in India has made wearing a helmet compulsory while riding a two-wheeler in major cities across the country. And this is what I really detest. This, in my opinion, is unnecessary meddling of the Government in people's affairs. No, I’m not retracting my stand on the issue of wearing helmets. I am only saying that I disapprove of the Government telling its adult citizens what to do and what not to do.

The government should realize that not forcing people to wear helmets can work for the benefit of everyone in the long run. It is understandable that those who dislike wearing helmets have an IQ that hovers around the 20 mark. So they are mostly useless when it comes to being part of a society, having the right to adult franchise, etc. Such people are more useful in death than in life. Why should we bother ensuring the safety of such idiots? So, let them vacate their place on earth for good. Once they kill themselves off, they leave the roads for safer and more sensible riders (you don't have to tell them, force them, or beg them to wear helmets, see?) who know how to enjoy the thrills of motoring without killing themselves or others. To add insult to injury, the families of the deceased shall not be able to recognize their faces! Serves them right! Besides, the traffic situation in the country will also improve tremendously.

It sure looks like a win-win situation to me!!

11 comments:

Rohit said...

Good one friend!!! Keep it up....(By the way, which brand's helmet do you own?)

Weltmeister said...

I own an Indian-made helmet, but it is ISI approved and of decent quality.

However, I aspire to own a Shoei, AGV or Schuberth helmet in future. Only if I someday own a deserving bike to go with it!!

Nilankur Dutta said...

Can't find their bare buttocks with their own two hands??????

HA HA HA HA HA ..

NEELAY said...

well ... i kinda agree with your views that if people want to endanger their own lives the govt. should'nt bother ... but given the despicable condition of our roads and incessant traffic jams.. it is practically impossible to reach 100mph unless you are truly nuts.
But the "bare buttocks" was too much...hahahah !!!

sharanya said...

I agree with you when you say that people who put such an abysmal price on their own lives don't deserve any better. Perhaps a more effective way to achieve the same end would be to nationalize the business of helmet-making and ban non-ISI approved helmets? That would narrow the choice to two- to buy a quality helmet or no helmet at all ie; to live or to perish:D

George said...

the trafic condition of indian roads alone doesn't deserve the citizens of this worthy country to wear any sort of headgear...........i found the bare buttocks erotic.......ha ha...from the tone of ur language i see u have some sort of seething anger against the fucked up Govn of India.........that's good dude.....keep it up!!!

Weltmeister said...

Sharanya

Your idea is good, but don't you think it's only going to work in an ideal situation. Most bans are not enforced in this country. So, it looks pretty grim.

suman said...

well said....yeah,living infront
of the busiest street in asansol,
i witness 3 accidents daily...so these helmets despising brainless
gits need some eternal peace....for sure!!
like others i agree that buttocks bit was brilliant..ha ha!!!

sharanya said...

Raunaq

Laws and other policies ought to be(and thankfully, are)made based on a ideal situation and when enforced tailor themselves to overcome an imperfect situation; not the other way around. Moreover, this one ban if imposed with a hefty fine for defaulters would be easy to impose n will be quickly adhered to as well.

Puspen Dasgupta said...

dude, sumhow i get a feeling u either witnessed or were part of an accident involving a biker widout his helmet. please confirm if my assumptions are baseless....

Eshaan said...

the reading at first was quite a natural one.But your way of changing the topic to governments mistake was incredible.It gave a new look to the post.